I should've been a model

I'm a young woman in my late 20's and I am in the position now when I constantly worry about the dreams and desires that I let slip through my fingers.  One of them being becoming a model.  We have a lot of dreams as children, some float away, some are forgotten and a few hang on in our minds and one or two (if we are lucky) come true.  Well modeling has been one of those dreams that have hung on.

I have always wanted to live the life of a model.  Jet-setting to Paris, London, Milan, having the top designers fight over my imagines for their advertisements.  But in my heart I never felt that this would be possible.  When, at 12, I started to grow past the size of my fellow classmates and cousins, I somehow knew that a traditional modeling career would be impossible for me.  So my eyes set to the Plus-Sized modeling arena.  Good news for little chubbies like me; Plus-Size modeling has become a big business.  With stores like Lane Bryant, Ashley Stewart, and The Avenue becoming more mainstream, people are desiring larger women to represent them.  Good news for chubbies, bad news for fatties, which I now find myself to be. 

Well to some, maybe not considered a "fatty" but defiantly not plus-size modeling material.  When I did my research a few years ago to be a model I found out that most plus models are still slim (size 10 to 14 range), are tall (I missed it "by that much"), and are athletically fit.  Ugh!  I can't win for losing.  So I gave up.  Gave up trying to be a model but still dreaming of being a model.  But worse part about not being an actual model is having so many friends that tell me that I should have been a model.  "You're so pretty" and "you would've made a great model"...thanks!  It's great to know that someone appreciates my good looks and ability to put together an outfit.

So, since this dream won't go away, I have been using the world as my runway.  As I walk down the aisle of my office I imagine that I am strutting down a Paris runway.  When I close my eyes I see myself on the cover of Vogue sporting my new line for the Plus Sized Diva.  When I'm at the grocery store I pretend that the paparazzi are following me to publish the next trend in fashion.  So I guess I'm telling myself NOT to give up.  I may not be there yet (and my "advanced" age disqualifies me) but I still believe.  I still think that someone will see my cute face and my striking outfit and want to put me on somebody's magazine.

I not just telling myself but I'm also telling those of you that are reading this.  Don't give up on your dreams.  Be one of the ones who get lucky enough to live out one or more of their dreams.